Top Two Ways to Properly Deal with a Break Up

Alright, I get it. You just got dumped. It's sucks but it happens to everyone. Trust me, it's happened to me plenty of times and these next two weeks are going to be-- Wait, what? You don't want to get over it? I can get behind that. I've been there too and I think I can help out. There are two things you need to do.

The first thing you want to do is:

Indulge, like, in everything.

I mean, you probably don't want to do drugs or anything like that -- you've never really been into doing drugs anyway -- but I do know you love ice cream and pizza and consuming things that you probably shouldn't be eating.

You should turn on the TV [they turn on the TV and put it on some show about Housewives or dating or something else that's very enjoyable and vapid but still very enjoyable]. And, yeah, start eating some of those snacks. Remember how your significant other always gave you shit for eating unhealthy or not taking care of your body? Well, fuck them and fuck that.

you are hurt and you need something soft and sweet

The second and final (and most important thing) you need to do is:

Stop caring. Seriously, nothing matters.

Nothing at all. You're hurt. Stay hurt. Don't worry about a thing, eat your chips, smoke your cigarettes, drink your shitty beer and boxed wine, and stay indoors. I don't care, you shouldn't either! Isn't that an amazing feeling?


Do whatever you want, man. Nothing matters anymore. Your heart is broken. That attractive person that lives next to you? Go knock on their door (or don't). That pack of cigarettes is looking particularly full and you want to empty it in a night? Fucking, do it (or don't).

go do and see all the things you do or don't want to

The only thing thatdoes matteris that you're alive

i did all that i could.
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