WARNING: Mature, gang related content.
It's the next day after coming into Youngjae's room; and as terrible as it sounds, I find that I’m becoming almost accustomed to being here. As nice as it was to have those few deep conversations I had with Yongguk, I feel a lot better in Youngjae’s care. And even if Yongguk is stronger, I feel safer now. Although, I do feel bad that I probably won’t ever be able to listen to Yongguk say what’s on his mind again and be the person who finally listened to him. He was very unique and I was honestly interested in what he talked about.
“I have to leave and take care of a deal today so you’ll have to go wait in a room we use for questioning with Daehyun until I come back.” Youngjae says this as he shuffles through a ledger.
“I’m not going to be with Yongguk?”
“No, this is a rather large deal and I can’t risk it. It wouldn’t be wise to bring a young guy like Daehyun, who lacks experience, as my guard. I’m going to need to take veteran like Yongguk.”
He looks up from his papers, his eyes questioning whether I am disappointed with this outcome. “Something wrong with that?”
“No. Daehyun just puts me on edge.”
“Ah, I see. If it’s any consolation, what he did to you was an order. He didn’t do it for personal reasons. He’s not a terribly mean guy. Anyway, there’s not much of a choice in the matter, that’s just how it has to be. I’ll warn him not to do anything; remember, I’m the boss around here for a reason.”
He stands and walks over to me, placing his hand on my cheek, lightly caressing it with his thumb; without thinking I lean into it. “Besides, I don’t want Yongguk with you anymore if I can help it. You’re like a delicate flower Seunghye, and I don’t want anything to happen. I trust him with many things but not you. I don’t know anything about his thoughts or actions toward women and would rather not take that chance. I regret leaving you with him for as long as I did. I just hope he didn’t get attached.” He lowers his hand and walks towards the door, mumbling something under his breath.
This is awkward. This guy has been sitting directly across from me, giving me death glares for the last hour. I’m looking in every other direction, but no matter what, I see him in my peripheral vision unmoving and staring at me. Maybe if I can make idle conversation it will get him to stop.
“So, how are you?” It’s so difficult to talk to someone who’s staring daggers at me.
“Shitty. Wanna know why?”
“Because you’re still here. I really wish they’d just fuckin kill you and be done with this. And then they can go kill that traitor brother of yours.”
“Excuse me?” Wait, traitor?
He leans forward in his chair. “I. Don’t. Like. You. I won’t be won over like the boss and Yongguk. Your brother was a traitor and as for you, I wouldn’t even trust you as far as I can throw you. I want you gone, but you could’ve very well gotten a lot of information out of this. Who knows, maybe you’d tell it all to your brother. That’s why I want you dead!” He slams his hand on the table as he spits these harsh words at me.
“I wouldn’t do that.”
“What part of “I don’t trust you” don’t you understand? For such an intelligent guy the boss is a bit naïve. He’s letting you get too close. And Yongguk? I see how he looks at you; he likes having you around. Pretty soon you’re going to end up causing the boss to lose focus of what’s important. We don’t need some bitch in here ruining what we have!”
I'm not going to silently sit here and take this abuse. “I want to leave too, you know! You think I want to be stuck here, playing house with a fucking gang leader?"
“I’m really curious how the hell you got as far as you have in here? What’d you do, spread your legs like a fucking whore! Shit, you and Yongguk were alone for almost 3 days in that room, he doesn’t talk so what’d you do that whole time? You make me sick, you’re a bitch, a skank, and a piece of shit. But what could one expect from Himchan’s sister. It was a mistake bringing you here.”
“He came to me asshole! He’s been going out of his way to talk to me, to spend time with me. I don’t know why he has! Why don’t you go yell at him because I can’t do anything about this from the position I’m in!”
“Oh yeah? What position is that, eh?” He gets up and walks over to me. Lifting me up by my arm and holding it behind my back while he shoves my face onto the table. He kicks the chair out of the way and shoves himself up against me from behind and bends over me and growls in my ear. “Is this the position you’re used to? Or maybe you're more at home on your knees.”
Youngjae walks in and sees what’s going on and is immediately enraged. “What the fuck is going on here!” He rips Daehyun off of me and shoves him into the wall pushing his forearm across his neck. Yongguk is standing with his mouth gaping; this must be the first time he's seen his boss like this. I can only stand here in shock watching as this scene unfolds.
“Answer me! What do you think you’re doing to her!” I can't believe how strong he is; Daehyun is barely on the ground.
His words are strained and barely audible. “Boss, wait, let me explain!”
“I’m listening! Let’s fuckin hear it!” His face is red and his eyes are burning with intensity. I’d have never expected him to react this extremely. He’s livid.
“You’re letting her get too close to you. Are you blind? This isn’t a good idea, just kill her. Himchan’s not taking the bait, so there’s no point in keeping her here. Kill her and then kill Himchan.”
Youngjae backs off and stands in front of Daehyun who’s rubbing his neck. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that, but this is frustrating watching you jeopardize our operation over nothing more than a woman you don’t even know.”
Youngjae strikes Daehyun's face and he falls to the floor. He proceeds to kick him once in the stomach; knocking the wind out of him. “I’m the leader! I’ll do what I see fit! You think you can tell me how to run this place? You’ve been here for two years and you think you know how to do this better than I do? You're still wet behind the ears you bastard! I know what I’m doing and my head is where it needs to be! You keep your filthy, fucking hands off of her and I don’t want to see that face of yours around here for a while.” He kicks him one more time before turning around to look at Yongguk.
He snaps his fingers at him and points at Daehyun. “Lock him up. No food, no water, just confinement for three days.” He squats down in front of Daehyun’s face and grabs his hair, holding his head up. “Consider yourself lucky that I don’t have you beaten within an inch of your life.” He let’s go, stands up, and spits on him before turning around to look at me.
He walks over to me; his face is still just as serious, but not angry, he’s deeply concerned. “Let’s go.” He helps me up and we walk out of the room. He turns his head and looks behind him. “Yongguk, feel free to do as you please. However, don’t damage him to the point that he’s rendered useless. Just a step before that.”
As we leave, the heavy door closes behind us. Walking down the hallway I can hear Daehyun’s cries in pain. This feeling is; I don’t know what this is.
We get back to Youngjae’s room, he has me lie on the bed and he sits down by me. I curl up on my side as he runs his hand up and down my back in an attempt to comfort me. I finally snap back to reality and start crying. I’m shaking and I don’t understand why that just happened.
We sat like that for a while, he stroked my back until I stopped crying.
“I’m sorry Seunghye. I didn’t know that he would do such a disgusting thing. I’m so sorry.” I hear him sniffling as he says this, “Everything you’ve been through is all my fault. I thought this would work, but I’ve put you through hell for no reason!”
He suddenly pulls me into his arms and holds me. I can feel his chest heaving and his body shaking. “I can never right all the wrongs I’ve done to you. Apologies are worthless. They’ll never be enough. Money, things, nothing can make up for this. I’m just so sorry.”
I can feel my shirt soaking up his tears. I find myself comforting him, hugging him back, and stroking his back as he had done for me. He’s dealing with so much turmoil fighting with himself over what he’s supposed to do.
Not much time passes before he falls asleep. He's like a child who exerts too much energy by being upset and simply passes out. I ease him down onto the bed, but he whines a little as I release him. Looking down at that pitiful, tear soaked, sleeping face that’s strained as though he’s in pain, I can’t help but lie down and embrace him. I hear his breathing even out and his face relaxes. He leans into my body and I allow it. We comforted each other that night; sleeping in each other’s warmth. And to be honest; it was the only decent sleep I’d gotten in days.