In the moment, I feel like you are the only one I can trust, the only person who really understands the dark, cruel demons that lurk in the shadowy recesses of my soul. I don't know why I keep making the same stupid mistake, trusting you. Over and over, you bury your blade in my chest, and still I feel some strange, unbroken allegiance to you. Still I confide in you. Again, you betray me. I know I cannot keep these festering memories locked away, to consume my soul, but why must you be the one I turn to? Is it merely habit? Am I just sticking with what I know, what feels familiar? You will stab me in the back again, and it will be as though I welcome this violation. Maybe I do. Maybe the torment is the only thing that feels real anymore. Or maybe it was just a stupid mistake among the hundreds of other stupid mistakes I'm always making.