If you have been following my writing, you will have seen numerous Excerpts from "Midnight Express".
You may have been wondering what is it?
"Midnight Express" is a fantasy young adult novel I have been writing since I was 15 years old. (Since 2007). I got the plot idea about it at a very young age, and I wrote most of the plot down when I was 15. Over the next few years, I realized that this story was mostly a story about a love triangle, or a complicated love story for teens.
I planned to publish it as soon as I finished writing it.
But when I entered University, I became a real devoted Christian, and this story became heavily influenced by my new religious beliefs. The plots changed quite dramatically. The overall theme of the story shifted from romance to a story about discovering an eternal love that was never bound to fade.
And then something crucial in my life happened that changed the story once more in a very dramatic but also traumatic way.
I fell in love. And it wasn't just an ordinary crush that you can forget.
No, it was a love so powerful that it nearly destroyed all that I was. This love nearly killed me, literally.
I suffered so much pain, anxiety, tears and heartache through this love that I discovered what true love really was.
It shed a light on how my idea of love was unrealistic and impossible.
I was never in an official relationship with this boy, but I loved him too much. It became a tragedy because I desired him more than anything in this world, and I lost my self worth, identity and dreams in order to win his love and affections. Everything I once held dear to my soul eradicated... My entire goal and focus in life was to win his heart... And this became my greatest folly and mistake in life. To trust all that I have, to depend all my hopes, to hang my entire life's purpose all on him. And of course, reality striked me. The unexpected happened. I used to believe we were once soul mates, that we would one day find each other. But... God allowed the worst pain in my life to his grand purpose. He was never mine, he loved someone else. I was the left out one. This love became unrequited. And my worst nightmare, what I feared most in this world, losing him, became my reality. He had left, he had gone. We were never together, but I always hoped that one day he will be mine and that we will come together. But that dream shattered. He loved another girl. And I couldn't bear this pain even with my faith. But then I realized that...
Nothing in this world is ever eternal except the love of Christ.
All of us depend all our life's hopes and purposes in order to find that one true love, and then we fall into despair when we found out it was all an unrealistic fantasy... A wishful thinking sort of fairy tale that never existed in this sinful world. True love only exists once one realizes what true unconditional love really is.
And this novel is about that.
It is about a prince who falls in love with a beautiful irresistable servant girl of his palace. She is from the colonized country, where the prince's kingdom has dominated over.
He falls madly in love with her.
It is mostly based around a royal kingdom setting, with touch of magical and fantasy elements added with sci-fi, action, drama, comedy but mainly tragedy.
But... She falls in love with his older brother, and then with another man. And this unrequited love drives him into insanity.
It is a story mostly about unrequited love.
It is a tragedy.
It is about how to deal with heartbreak, heartache, rejection, betrayal, pain, unrequited love, desire, lust, passion, jealousy, envy, insecurity, fear, sorrow, despair and the desire to be loved infinitely.
It is an autobiography, the story that I hold most closest to my own soul.
And through writing this story, I have become more intimate with Jesus Christ, because he has taught me what unconditional love really is.
I plan to finish writing it during this summer holidays, being stuck in the school library all day trying to finally finish the manuscript after 9 years since I first started writing it.
As much as I took in trying to finally finish this story, those 9 years have really been worth it in order to put all my short, immature but rich life lessons and experiences into this novel. This novel is from my heart, my soul. And I dream of the day when it will somehow help others who have also been broken by a love that nearly destroyed everything they had.
I hope you will all get a chance to read it someday and have your hearts and souls mended, the way I slowly did in the process of writing it.