A pun is the lowest form of wit, It does not tax the brain a bit; One merely takes a word that's plain And picks one out that sounds the same. Perhaps some letter may be changed Or others slightly disarranged, This to the meaning gives a twist, Which much delights the humorist. A sample now may help to show The way a good pun ought to go: "It isn't the cough, that carries you off, It's the coffin they carry you off in.
1. The inventor of the rocket went out to launch.
2. Walter Hunt invented the safety pin in 1849. He wasn't too successful at first, but he stuck to his work.
3. Isaac Fisher patented sandpaper in 1834. He really had it rough.
4. There's a Santa Claus school in White Plains, New York.
5. Some of the students graduate just in the St. Nick of time.
6. The first savings bank opened for guys and dollars.
7. The guy who invented the circular saw wanted to take a shortcut.
8. William Canby is credited with inventing the first computing scales, which proves that when there's a Will there's a weigh.
9. When Roz began her first marble sculpture, she did chip work.
10. When the first self-winding clock was made, everyone was tick-led.
11. The first school was a classy place.
12. The first mail delivery by steamboat was authorized; it carried coast cards.
13. When the first escalator was used, everyone said it was a step in the right direction.
14. The first artificial fish was the plastic sturgeon.
15. A Shriner went unrecognized when he had his fez lifted.
16. A sculptor friend of mine celebrated his birthday and everyone chipped in for a gift.
17. The first use of shellac wasn't successful, and it soon varnished from sight.
18. Miners who wear illuminated helmets say it makes them feel lightheaded Pogo sticks make people jumpy.
19. The first macaroni factory in Chicago had to pasta inspection.
20. During World War II, people honored women soldiers at a WACs museum.
21. Used dromedaries are sold in Arabia in a place called Camel.