they say perfect love drives out fear. if so there must not be perfect love in me, because I'm terrified. in fact that terror is slowly becoming apathy, and that is what scares me the most. I'm falling and I don't know if I'm wearing a parachute. if I am then I don't know how to pull it. even if I knew how to pull it, I'm not sure if I would. I'm falling in love with falling.